[Here, Neil would laugh, mirthless and biting. Full of self-hatred. He releases Alex and straightens to a stand.]
Never had friends, never had lovers.
[A repeat. There is a point and a purpose.]
Never knew how to show affection. Lived too long guarding against people. Using them. Hating them. It was the only way I could think to respond to you. Doesn't excuse it or make it right. But that's why.
[He inhales sharply, stale air filling his lungs.]
I once read boys sometimes bully the girls they like. Push them into the mud in hopes of continuing interaction. Guess I'm basically that little cocksucker.
no subject
Never had friends, never had lovers.
[A repeat. There is a point and a purpose.]
Never knew how to show affection. Lived too long guarding against people. Using them. Hating them. It was the only way I could think to respond to you. Doesn't excuse it or make it right. But that's why.
[He inhales sharply, stale air filling his lungs.]
I once read boys sometimes bully the girls they like. Push them into the mud in hopes of continuing interaction. Guess I'm basically that little cocksucker.