a closed cave.

[dovahfahdon]

[ A rejection of touch had never ended in such a parting. The dragon flew off, as dragons often do, and Alain expected him back within hours. When that failed to pass, he expected then days.

When that failed he grew concerned.

It had become months before he found the cave. Months edging on half of a year, and it was still nearly accidental when he came across the fissure in the mountain. Habit had him moving inward, and the presence of a dragon had him reaching for his mace.

...The sight of Niall had him dropping it.

The dragon, curled as if laying on the ground to speak to Alain, great eyes shut tight. As if sleeping. Something in Alain, something unknown and small, prompted him to cross to the dragon, even with the unknown danger of waking a sleeping dragon, to call to him, speak his name, touch his scales and pray for warmth.

When nothing came of it, he prioritized. He shut down his mind and moved in processes. He left the cave, sold his extra weapons and spent all the funds on resources and food. Returned to the cave with bulging packs and set them in the cavern. Moved to the tunnel to cast destruction spells and conjuration as well, to tear into the pathway inside with abandon.

When it came down with a crash, Niall hardly moved.

Alain settled near his bags and closed his mind to thought.

Time was outside of him.

Perhaps it had been hours.

Perhaps it had been months. ]

Comments

[dovahfahdon]

[ There is a low intonation somewhere above his head, and even as his mind tries to tell him otherwise, his essence knows the language well. Easily knows enough to translate, to communicate, despite all of his claims otherwise. The low sound pulses within him, and somewhere, he makes out sense and sanity.

Makes a small effort to regain his breath. ]

Hin laas? Neh nahl los hin.

[ Your life? Never living is yours.

Alain breathes heavily, and tries to look at the dragon. ]

Zu'u folaas?

[ Am I wrong?

He suddenly struggles, pressing upward. ]

Tell me!

[nehnahlmey]

[Hearing the language of his blood should distract him. Take him away from this trembling wreck of a man and his seemingly inane questions.

The dragon only answers, body still despite the movements beneath him.]

Folaas, Dovahkiin.

[You are completely wrong.]

Zu'u lost siiv dii lahney ko Alain.

[I have found my life in you.]

[dovahfahdon]

[ The words are not to be taken. They are not to be kept.

This is a dragon, not a person, and yet what does Alain know of people? Only that they are not to be trusted, that they are capable of the greatest betrayals and sins, be them Man or Mer. Mayhaps a dragon would be a better choice.

But this is a dragon, outside of time. Niall would tire of him, forget about him like he had here, and Alain would be left alone. What would happen when that eventually came? When Niall eventually flew off and did not return?

But this is a dragon, cursed by his brethren to be a fool who does not know life or living. A dragon that lacks the aspects that call to that for Men, Mer, and Dov--desire, possession, and ambition. But Alain has always said differently, for Niall has shown him differently. The dragon is a curious creature, insatiable on certain subjects, and not easily put off of others. He is stubborn, strong-headed, clever, intelligent, coy, infuriating.... All things that make Alain irritated; all things that he would wish for in a companion.

A dragon, cursed by his brethren to be a fool who does not know life or living, and Alain still knows it to be true regardless. He has seen other dragons interact with Niall like something strange, irregular or diseased. Something that lacks, something that some resent for the power that he still holds. This is not a blood dragon missing pieces, but a legendary one, and it grates at them, Alain knows it; it grates that this non-dragon is superior to most in power.

A dragon who does not know life or living, who claims Alain as his own.

It should be rejected. The words are not to be taken. Not to be kept. Alain knows this, knows it well. Knows that to accept the words means he will give a part of himself away. That is nothing wanted. Not at all. He knows this. He knows it well.

But he has sat by himself for over a month now. He has sat in a cave that housed the silent body of the being that he respects most--desires most--cares for most. He has sat by himself for over a month now, and has allowed himself to slip and fall in the mental cracks, for he did not expect--

Alain did not think that this would have an ending other than death. He had set himself to death for the lack of this dragon, despite all of Alain's dreams and ambitions. Alain gave in to dying without Niall.

He stills, hands still on the wing pinning him. Fingers tracing nothing against flesh. He watches his fingers move, trace with abandon, and he starts, jolts, then stills again. ]

Then you can't--

[ He says suddenly, out of nowhere. His wide eyes blink in confusion at his speech, then he closes his eyes, goes slack.

Continues the words he had begun to say on instinct. ]

...You can't leave me. You can't ever leave me. You can't go away.