[ Two men settle around a table, low and wooden, rough along the edges. Alain Ebon has made it months ago, but the other man across from him likely doesn't know that.
There's a beat, a moment. Alain thinks to offer. ]Is there anything you'd like to eat?
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[Oh, wonderful. He just insulted the Dragonborn. Have more affect in his features before he stares at his feet.]
...Sorry.
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Staring for a long, long few minutes. The Dragonborn disapproves. Understands, but disapproves utterly. ]
...Is it your nature to lash out with words when hurt? It's a habit you'd do well to break.
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I don't know, Alain. I really don't. Probably?
[Maybe.]
I'm sorry for being so rude.
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Will be sacrificed, taken, used against him--
And despite Nigel not being as young as his sisters, as small, Alain still steps forward, touches the other's dark hair before slipping arms around the other in a light embrace.
It is a breach of bounds. But they are family, all the same. ]
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Given the choice, he needs a breach of bounds, a line to be crossed. And that is what Alain does. He steps over to take Nigel into his arms, as a parent would a child. The embrace is light and easily broken, but nothing within him would push away this comfort, and it is here he would fall into a kind of childish shame.
Nigel begins to cry in silence, in frustration and sadness.]
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...Notes the wet against his leathers, but allows the child his pride. ]
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Finally, Nigel loses the need. He reaches upward to dry his eyes.]
Could you not tell Alan about this? The, um, crying, I mean.
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What tears?
[ Though grant the Dragonborn his interest. ]
Would that man be upset if you expressed your pain?
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...Exactly. Thanks.
[He breathes deep before addressing the Dragonborn's interest.]
Likely. I'm still working on the reasons.
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Alan would be upset at that? I cannot accept him as a separate self if he's so disregarding to his partner's pain.
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I don't think he disregards my pain. I think my pain affects him.
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If it affects him, then he would likely want to help you--support you.
[ Alain eyes Nigel. It's a curiosity but one now more obvious. What Alain stated is likely unwanted.
But why? ]
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I cannot forget.
[A beat passes.]
Every day, every minute, every moment of my waking life-- I cannot escape remembering. It has been that way since my birth.
[Living as a prisoner of memory.]
You heal through forgetting, someone once told me. You learn to forgive by letting go. There is neither help nor support for someone who lacks the capacity. Alan is wasting his time.
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[ Said gently, despite this. ]
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Child? What?Looks sad.]Likely.
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[ Alain is quiet. ]
But you gain strength from recall. From remembering those hardest times and the awful circumstances. From being held to your own foolishness and made to bear your deepest loss. You may not want it, but it's a part of you.
[ His eyes flicker up, to view the other. ]
And he knows that as well.
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Alain.
[Green eyes meet the other's pale.]
I just don't want to burden Alan. He deserves better than what I can offer.
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[ As he's repeated. ]
You cannot decide that for him. Ask him, Nigel--his wants.
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Nigel looks away, partly ashamed.]
...Yeah.
[He will. When they are alone, he will ask Alan.]
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[ The Dragonborn has the grace to look away. ]
He may think the same of you.
[ That Nigel deserves better than what Alan offers him. ]
We all have our weight to drag behind us. It's something to realize.