Alternative Methods.

[doubletap]

Has sex become repetitious? Feeling sore in certain areas? Well, good news! Your boyfriend has sent you on a quest to find different ways of having fun gay sex. Yay!

Find the following people and seek out their knowledge:

• Arcade Israel Gannon (=D)
  
• Jimmy (Westside)
  
• Old Ben (Freeside)
  
• Doctor Alex Richards (Novac)
  
• Ignacio Rivas (Helios One)

Good luck, Wanderer!

Comments

[duraframe]

A moment of quiet buzzing, ED-E hovering up and down in thought. Not kid-friendly. ED-E knows that Neil and Alex think of him as something young--he's already eight years old! But he doesn't really mind. But here, he wonders.

What is it?

[goodfight]

ED-E sobers. The moment's enough, just right enough for Neil to at least answer honestly.

"Alex wants me to learn from folks on how to be better at this lovey-dovey stuff," he explains in careful words. "Seeing how we both kinda never had, um, an actual partner. Romantic partner."

The last clarification's there just in case the eyebot thinks he's talking about general friendship.

[duraframe]

Lovey-dovey? Like--

Oh! Like when you mate, he buzzes sagely.

[goodfight]

And there's that awkward. Neil succeeds in keeping his normal coloring.

Which ultimately means another function fails, and he starts sputtering.

[duraframe]

ED-E feels proud and bobs up and down.

You didn't need to go looking. I could help!

And thus plays a clip of a female moaning.

[goodfight]

Holy shit. That joke about ED-E recording "relations" isn't a joke at all. Neil stares at the kid, mouth comically agape. When he gets over that ridiculousness, he tries not to bust out laughing.

Ah, fuck it. He's going to start choking on his own laughter now.

[duraframe]

Ah, wait, wait, right. Alex and Neil are both males. Maybe just playing back something from the past then.

The woman cuts off. In its place is a male, panting hard, inter-spaced with quiet groans.

...It's obviously Neil's voice.

[goodfight]

Aaand that laughter's turning to a pained yelp.

"...You didn't." Neil groans, the reality of his own reactions being played back hitting him like a sack of marbles. "You did, ah, goddamn it. ED-E, why?"

[duraframe]

Happy burble.

[goodfight]

He presses both palms to his eyes.

"Dude. Bro. That...only tells me that I sound freaking retarded." A pause. "And I hope you haven't clued Alex in on this particular recording. Or, fuck, others."

[duraframe]

Ah, right. Right. Neil would rather learn from a different person more than himself.

So instead he plays Alex. Giving the distinct sounds he does when he finishes.

[goodfight]

Oh. Now there's a strangled sound from the one wishing he had remained blissfully ignorant up to this point. Plus, his efforts to keep his normal coloring are just gone. Gone and gone.

[duraframe]

Happy burble again. And now that they are alone, ED-E bobs forward, butting Neil lightly in his most friendly manner.

[goodfight]

The benign contact has Neil peering upward at the eyebot.

"So," Neil starts. "You got every single time we were doing it?"

[duraframe]

No, he answers easily.

Then adds, You're together too much to record it all.

[goodfight]

Here, Neil drops his hands, mild surprise etched on his face.

"Really? I thought we were way below average when it comes to frequency." But this is starting to get super-duper awkward again. Time to shift gears. "Why do you record that stuff anyway?"

[duraframe]

Hobby, is all that's given. Learning.

More importantly, Neil had mentioned Alex had told Neil to learn more to get better at lovey-dovey stuff. That seems unnecessary! You don't have to try to get better at that. You're fine how you are.

...Happy burble.

[goodfight]

So kinda like how kids before the Great War would watch wildebeests mate on TV, ED-E's utilizing recordings for the sake of education. It rings of rationality in an exceptionally strange way.

That statement, though... Neil can't help the self-deprecating chortle. "I don't know. One guy doing the brunt of the work isn't my definition of fine. I just kinda lie there and, ugh, take it."

Crap. Now he's confessing things to ED-E. Neil must be off-kilter today--you know, after four in-depth discussions about sex.

[duraframe]

ED-E buzzes in thought. Certainly, Neil has a point. The point of friendship, no matter what kind, was a give and a take. One person couldn't do all the work.

But friendship had different ways that it balanced.

He smiles with you, ED-E offers. He's happy with you. He wasn't. Before. Before everything ended. And after. You give him things, too.

[goodfight]

Somehow, it is a hovering eyebot from the wretched East who drives the point home, and the young man who shares his hometown finds himself beaming at the idea. At the sheer notion that Alex Seattle Geer is happier with him. It's so great to hear that Neil doing something right, for once.

In time, reality softens his expression, but it still remains. He looks to the side, suddenly quiet. "I'm glad," he speaks, voice soft. "I hope I can continue that."

[duraframe]

Neil makes a nice expression. ED-E burbles in appreciation.

You have to stay, he insists. Stay with us.

[goodfight]

I would love to stay. With them. More than anything.

Neil blinks. "Not planning on leaving you guys."

[duraframe]

He hovers up and down. Then it'll continue. The happiness. Alex's smiles. Neil staying is a good thing.

...However.

You're traveling with Angry-armor-glasses? That's why you didn't want me?

[goodfight]

Continue. Yeah.

The mention of Arcade, on the other hand, has Neil frowning. "No, I'd have asked you if the thought actually occurred to me," he clarifies. "Arcade was just first on the list of people I needed to talk to. I then kinda freaked myself out and asked him to accompany me for the others."

His frown deepens. "I really don't know what his problem is."

[duraframe]

It's in his name, the problem. At least that's what Alex told him. ED-E calls Arcade Angry-armor-glasses, and Alex says the armor is the problem. There's a past and a history, and ED-E is just a reminder of that.

But ED-E thinks he just doesn't like AIs. And says as much in a grinding buzz.