abstracts | Alternative Methods.

Arcade has the deadest look in all the land training on Neil Park-- Who needs a middle name so Arcade can lengthen his name. "Why, yes, Neil Park. That is indeed the person who was explicitly detailed. As well as someone who can hear us talking at the moment."

Who looked amused more than insulted, but he also knew Arcade lightly.

Arcade just sighs.

Neil "No Middle Name" Park, in the meantime, aims a toothy grin in the general direction of Arcade Israel Gannon. "I never said I was subtle," he says, eyes coming to rest on the man appearing more tickled than not.

"Hey," Neil continues before pausing thoughtfully. "Actually, I think I've seen you hanging around here before."

The guy smiles, in that cordial way you don't find in the Wastes. "I sure hope so. Freeside has been home for, well, as long as I can remember. The name's Old Ben, by the way."

Edited 2017-03-26 00:20 (UTC)

This is the "Easy Mode" off of Alex's checklist. Arcade doesn't see a point to being here for this one at all. "Hiya Ben," he says without emotion. "My friend here has a few questions for you, and I--"

He gives a pointed look to Neil. "Will be over there."

Do one on your own and maybe Arcade will help with the rest.

Old Ben greets Arcade with benignity as Neil lets betrayal sneak onto his facial features. Nevertheless, the Followers doctor has declared his intentions, and the conversation continues without him. Neil tries not to appear too lost.

"I'm Neil." Just Neil. "Hope you don't mind the intrusion."

The other chuckles. "Not at all. It's nice having somebody approach me for once. Stopping people to warn them about that gate gets pretty tiring after the umpteenth time." Here, he jerks his head back toward the aforementioned collection of Securitrons and rusty fencing. "Anyway, Neil, how many I be of service?"

Surprisingly, Neil doesn't go straight to the point, veering instead into the territory of why. Why hang around the fence? Why warn anyone at all? Then the what-- What do you do outside of preventing folks from being riddled with lasers and bullets? What kind of stuff? Ben proves quite patience, his words and stories having that repetitive element, as though the man has recounted such matters a million times before.

This eventually pays off. "Yeah, shit indeed happens. I was stripped of my casino apartment and all of my belongings and booted back into Freeside," says Old Ben. "From there I didn't have a lot of career options, as my rep was destroyed. So the escort job sort of fell into my lap, no pun intended."

Neil blinks, the job title rolling around in his head. The act turns up very little in terms of sense. "You said escort?" he asks. "Like armed guard?"

The other guy very obviously tries not to laugh. "Well, I supposed you could look at it that way, but I was packing a whole different kind of heat. No, escort just sounds better than man-whore."

Oh. That escort. No wonder Alex had him on the list.

Of the man himself, the Followers knew Ben as someone who was helpful and trustworthy. Julie said he was here when they set up in this town, and god knows how long before then. Despite his array of professions, he seemed like one of the few willing and wanting to help people rather than take advantage of them. A "good" guy.

Like he said, easy mode.

He coughs obnoxiously, reminding Neil. They had three other stops and if this took more than a week, he would start charging.

Neil freezes momentarily at the cough before barreling ahead. No inhibitions, no holds barred. Awkward yet bluntly delivered, as only an innocent from the Capital Wasteland could be. "You must have learned some tricks," he comments, "from that escort job."

This takes even friendly Old Ben by surprise, and he stares at the kid like he just cursed his (dead) mama. "Sure did," the man says, tone trapped between amused and wary. "I got damn good at them, too. Made it so I never lacked in clientele." A pause. "Why? You looking to get into that business?"

"Maybe," Neil mutters, thoroughly distracted, before he realizes his error. He then shakes his head furiously, his face slowly turning bright red. "Oh, wait, I mean--"

Too late. "Kid," Ben starts, his voice dropping to the level of paternal concern. "I'm not going to stop you if that's what you intend to do, but the gig's no cakewalk. You're going to give up a lot more than your dignity with that kind of work."

"No, no," said "kid" sputters. "I ain't planning on sleeping with strangers. I just--" Just spill it out, Neil Park. "I was just wondering if you might have any tips for me. Sleeping with a guy."

Old Ben blinks as if the older man couldn't quite believe what he was hearing.

"I have a boyfriend," says Neil, still hopelessly clinging to his pride.

Oh. Oh, this is painful. Utterly so, enough that Arcade is starting to be repaid for the whole scene back at the Fort. Grinning disgustingly, Arcade ~~sashays~~ walks up to the pair, putting a hand on Neil's shoulder. "You have to forgive him," Arcade mentions, cheerfully pert.

Maybe this will be worth his time. "It's his first boyfriend. And Neil here happened to be the one who bagged the Courier."

Edited 2017-03-26 02:01 (UTC)

Neil whirls on Arcade's treacherous snake words, eyes wild and edging panicked. "Shit, no, I'm not. Stop lying." His gazes flicks back to Ben, unknowingly pleading. "He's lying."

After all, that would cause quite a stir, wouldn't it? Alex Seattle Geer, the white-haired Courier, "fraternizing" with this nobody-- It might be inconvenient for Alex, wouldn't it? To have that kind of rumor floating around for a guy known for playing around, even as it is the truth.

Kinda depressing, that.

The eldest of three stares for a beat longer, expression notably blank. It doesn't last long, as most things do, and to Neil's utter surprise, he breaks the quiet with intense laughter. "The Courier, huh?" he tells Arcade, wiping the tears from his eyes. "Funny, he never struck me as a cradle-robber. You, on the other hand--"

He smiles at Neil, and somehow, the gesture is enough for the younger to look uncomfortably away. "--I can believe has his first boyfriend. You know, Neil, the polite thing to do when asking a strange man about his techniques in bed is to say please."

Oh. My. God. Neil (god he needs a middle name) Park is horrified. Horrifyingly embarrassed. Oh my god. Veronica will never believe him when he tells her about this.

"Veronica is never going to believe me when I tell her about this," he cheerily repeats over the cascade of laughter. "You're making such nice expressions while you deny your intense love."

At Ben's dig, Arcade only shrugs. "Me, neither." To which or both, who can say. "My taste has always ran to just a handful of years younger." He is obviously, to himself, referencing one other, but quickly realizing that that could also mean-- "Not to say that I'm looking toward his paramore," he adds in, with a headtilt at Neil. "Just in general."

A groan slips out of Neil's disgraced mouth as he drags his fingers down his face. Who is he kidding? Asking people about sex is just plain fucked up, especially when the questioner is him. No pun intended.

The smile on Old Ben's lips upgrades to a grin, still infectiously pleasant for a guy his age. "Nothing wrong with a healthy age gap," he remarks. "Though I've got to say... Why isn't the wiser, more experienced 'friend' of yours giving you these tips? And I don't mean the literal one."

Ha ha. Neil's just going to stand here and try to compose himself. And somehow avoid turning ruddier than he already is. "He thought an outside perspective might be more valuable," he says, bullshitting out of his ass. "And it's still not this Courier guy."

"Whoever he is," Ben continue, "he could have at least done the decent thing and be here to hear this." There, again, is that grin. "Well, let's get right to it. You're looking to please your boyfriend, right? Hmm."

See. Ben is the type of guy that would wind up frustrating Arcade to no end by these answers. And this answers every last question about why the man is friends with Alex. "Just give it up," he complains to Neil. "You're going to have to name drop to get some of them to talk to you so just get comfortable with the fact that you're with Alex. He's not the worst you could have in a lover, and it's not that embarrassing to be with him."

The other man gets down to things, and when he questions Neil, Arcade again pipes up. "Less pleasing the boyfriend and more mutual pleasing." He's not brave enough to share details about Alex's... talents with a stranger.

Neil glares at Arcade, as if set off by the mere concept of Alex being the worst. What he blandly states, of course, is, "I'm not giving away his identity."

All of which Ben thoughtfully ignores. "Mutual pleasing," he echoes. "Here's something simple enough. I'm assuming you know how to get yourself off."

Theoretically, Neil thinks, head nodding once.

"It runs on the same principle; there's just two people to satisfy. Whether you work on yourselves or each other, it honestly doesn't matter. Though--" He smiles in a strange manner. "It's pretty fun to see your partner get bothered as you work yourself up."

So that thing about not turning any redder? Well, it goes out the fucking metaphorical window. "Oh," he says, sounding more intimidated than he probably should.

Edited 2017-03-26 04:10 (UTC)

Oh god. In a whole different way. This apparently is actually easy mode, and it's still far out of Neil's difficulty level. How is Neil going to deal with--

Arcade places a hand to his chin in thought. "Digression and blatancy, Neil," he reminds. Just get all the details for now.

Thus does the Nice Friend thing while Neil hopefully recovers. And continues the conversation. "On each other, you have the obvious pluses of affecting the other person. But on yourself you get to see how much you actually affect the other person, and not just when you have their genitals in your hand."

Or. Otherwhere, in Neil's case. Ugh.

Suddenly, with full force, it hits Neil that he's discussing sex with a friend and a complete stranger. That he's expected to absorb all this information for Alex's stupid quest. That he has a boyfriend after years of having absolutely nothing. It suddenly becomes too much to handle, and his chest starts to constrain, pressing tight against his beating heart.

Arcade mentions digressing and blatancy, and it is this that pacifies that rising fear, softens that sharp realization cutting against the fragile parts of his mind. Neil breathes. He continues.

"Isn't that kinda like torture to the other person?" Neil queries. "Seeing your, uh, partner but not touching them."

Old Ben nods to both men. "The more he likes you, the more affected he'll be," he states. "You could view it as torture, but I'd recommend seeing that form of masturbation as foreplay."

"Extreme foreplay," Arcade adds, glad to see Neil is back in the game. "As you'll most likely be jumped right after. Or at least have someone beggin--"

He cuts off, a hand on his face. "...Ah, there we are. Having imagery we did not want again."

The old man chuckles in good nature. "Good thing we're more or less done with the topic," he says to Arcade, attempting to spare the doctor from further imagery. And mental injury. "Do you have any other questions for me, Neil?"

Neil considers, lips twisting in thought. "Get each other off. Or get yourself off to get him off-- Ugh." He tries not to sigh. "Yeah, I think I got the gist."

Ben smiles at the kid. "The sky's the limit with mutual masturbation," he states. "It should be simple enough for beginners but varied enough for the veterans. Won't steer you wrong."

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