It's not as if Alex has forgotten what took place in Vault 7. That's not it. It's only that the memories of the event, the intensity, faded, like most things do. It's been nearly three weeks since they've been back to the Mojave, from the vault of truth and misguided tour of California. And after the initial couple of days, Alex had things to check on in Vegas, and Neil had to sell some more of the items he brought back from the Capital. It wasn't that they weren't spending time together--there was just a couple of things for them to take care of.
Then when Alex finished his stuff, Neil went to visit Arcade and those two went on a week long trip. So Alex started something he's been putting off: Finishing laying to rest the inhabitants of the Hidden Valley bunker and cleaning out the rubble from the remains. It was tiring physically and exhausting emotionally. It also made him return to his prior mindset: That despite friends and those closer, the things most affecting on him would be his and his alone to carry.
Neil would deny that.
Deny it and remind Alex, through kind touches, offers of want, and reiterations of commitment. It's something new, something hard to grasp, but it's there. Something permanent, right in his grasp.
Not something shining in the sand.
(He thinks to tell him then, about the nightmares that started since Vault 7. About the city shining between the dusty cliffs, about the faceless people welcoming him back home. He thinks to tell him-- But he swallows it. It's too much. Not right now.)
Alex breathes out, leans up to rest his head against Neil's. The intensity doesn't fade, but it shifts, becomes less sexual. "...I know I offered sex, but can I tell you something right now?"
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Then when Alex finished his stuff, Neil went to visit Arcade and those two went on a week long trip. So Alex started something he's been putting off: Finishing laying to rest the inhabitants of the Hidden Valley bunker and cleaning out the rubble from the remains. It was tiring physically and exhausting emotionally. It also made him return to his prior mindset: That despite friends and those closer, the things most affecting on him would be his and his alone to carry.
Neil would deny that.
Deny it and remind Alex, through kind touches, offers of want, and reiterations of commitment. It's something new, something hard to grasp, but it's there. Something permanent, right in his grasp.
Not something shining in the sand.
(He thinks to tell him then, about the nightmares that started since Vault 7. About the city shining between the dusty cliffs, about the faceless people welcoming him back home. He thinks to tell him-- But he swallows it. It's too much. Not right now.)
Alex breathes out, leans up to rest his head against Neil's. The intensity doesn't fade, but it shifts, becomes less sexual. "...I know I offered sex, but can I tell you something right now?"